Solving the Root Problem

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I’ve seen too much time, energy and money wasted on trying to solve the wrong problem… the ‘symptom’ problem. We try different things over and over again and can’t seem to get it figured out. <– perhaps you can relate?

It’s highly frustrating, not to mention costly, when we aren’t focused on solving the ‘real’ problem. The one that can make all the difference.

How delegation led to my identity crisis

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2010 was the year that my business officially became bigger than me.

It was the year that I shifted my business model from 1-1 service provider to a training/coaching model.

And as part of the shift there was simply too much work for me to keep doing it all myself – so I needed to start hiring.

My very first hire that year was my OBM Tiffany. She jumped in with both feet – working side by side with me to manage projects and move the business forward. I delegated stuff to her and she took it on.

It was EXACTLY what I wanted, but what I didn’t expect was how I was going to feel about it.

I remember waking up one morning thinking:

“If I’m no longer the one DOING all the work – then what value am I bringing to the table?”

It was a major identity crisis for me! I had spent the past 10 years of my business as the DOER. It was what I was good at. It was what people paid me for. It was the place I knew best and felt comfortable in.

And suddenly here I was – less doing on my plate (which is exactly what I wanted) and feeling like I needed to keep myself involved, constantly checking in with my team and looking over their shoulders because I didn’t know what else to do with myself!

Thankfully I had a great coach at the time who walked me through this, and helped me to realign my identity from DOER to LEADER. To realize that my role was now to be a leader for my team, my clients and my business.

Perhaps you can relate?

I find that when people struggle with delegation it is often based on an underlying fear of losing their identity. And that if they aren’t careful they will default to ‘taking it all back’ simply to keep that identity in place.

If this resonates with you my best advice is this:

  • Notice It – we can’t change that which we can’t see
  • Honor It – your identity has been the foundation of your success to date and it deserves to be honored!
  • Redefine It – what new identity will serve the next level of your growth? Maybe it’s the shift from DOER to LEADER (like it was for me.) Maybe it is something else
  • Shift It – operate as though the new identity is in place. Make decisions from that space. Spend your time in that new identity. Initially it will be uncomfortable to make this shift and the lure of going back to your old identity may be strong… but the only way to make the change is to stay the course here until your new identity becomes your norm.

Are you hiring to the task or the vision?

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There are two different ways to approach hiring.

You can hire to the TASK.

Or you can hire to the VISION.

When you hire to the task you – and the person you hire – are focused on WHAT needs to be done. On the specifics. The nitty-gritty. The stuff.

When you hire to the vision you are focused on the WHY. The bigger picture. Bringing the pieces together.

Traditional hiring is very task focused. Create a description of the role. Find someone who has those skills. Hire them and manage them to make sure stuff gets done.

Vision based hiring takes it to another level.

It’s about first being crystal clear on the vision of your business. Why you are doing what you do. Who you are impacting.

And first looking to find people who CONNECT with your vision. People who are aligned with the mission and excited about the possibilities.

Then looking at tasks of the role, and either hiring to the needed skillset OR being open to training someone to the role. (I’m a huge fan of training someone up into a role when they are aligned to the vision and bring the enthusiasm and energy we are looking for.)

When you hire to the vision you hire people who CARE.

Who care about whether or not things get done, because they see the bigger picture and know their part in it. They are willing to go the extra mile when needed. To look at additional ways to support at a higher level.

They bring the best of who they are to the table, because they are plugged into something that matters.

This is the kind of team that rises up and makes a real difference in the world.

This is the heart of my new book Hire Up – where I’m exploring the impact of connection & collaboration in teams.

All things are possible when we come together. Work together. Laugh together. Create together.

Wouldn’t you agree?

Feeling restless…

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I get it. I’ve been feeling restless too.

Feeling like there is something more that I’m being called to. Another level of LEADERSHIP. Another level of service.

Feeling like I have so much more to give. Tapping into my GENIUS work and really getting to own my gifts. My natural talents.

Feeling like I want more CONNECTION. More collaboration. Tired of being the ‘lone wolf’ in my business.

Even feeling a bit frustrated – and I daresay bored – at times with what I’m doing.

If you are feeling this way too I want to honor that. I want to create a space to ALLOW it…

You are feeling restless for a reason.

There is something calling to you. Another level. A deeper way to connect and serve.

It can be easy to try and avoid this call. Ignore it. Keep pushing.

But it doesn’t go away… the more we try to avoid it, the more restless we feel.

As I honor this in myself, my own journey, I invite you to do the same.

Allow yourself to dream. To breathe. To play with the possibilities of what is coming… even if you can’t see it clearly yet.

I have (quietly) started a new group where together we are taking things to the next level. Based on the values of collaboration, connection and creation. We have only 2 spots left and I invite you to reply to this email to let me know if you are feeling called to join us.

There is power in the restlessness if we choose to listen. <3

When your team keeps asking you too many questions

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How can you lead your team to stop asking so many questions? I share my top tip in today’s video.

The first 90 days

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I like to call the first 90 days with any new client the dating period.

This is the time when you get to know each other, start working together and ultimately see if it’s a fit (or not.)

Here are my top 3 tips to make the most of your first 90 days with a new client.

1) Get Agreement

It’s important that you and your new client are on the same page with what it is you want to accomplish together. I can’t tell you how often I’ve seen someone get hired and think X was the priority only to find out down the road that the client thought Y was the priority.

Make sure you and your new client are on the same page with goals and priorities right from day one.

2) Look for the quick win!

If you really want to wow a client look for a quick win – something you can do in within the first week of starting to work together. Complete a project that has been hanging around FOREVER that they are feeling frustrated about. Take something off their plate that is stressing them out. Help them get clarity on something that has stumped them for months.

When we are only focused on the big stuff it can sometimes take weeks (or months!) to see progress. This can have an impact on how your clients see you and might even have them questioning your work together. Look for the quick win so they can feel great about your work together right away.

3) Measure yourself before they measure you

Check in with your clients at the 30/60/90 day mark to evaluate where you are at (in relation to the agreements made at the start), what is working, what may be off track and what you are doing to take care of it. Ask them how they feel like things are going and if there is anything more (or less) they want to see from your work together.

This isn’t about being perfect, it’s about acknowledging where things are at and demonstrating that you are on top of it. This takes courage to do – as you are essentially putting yourself out there to acknowledge what may NOT be working and that never feels good. But here’s the thing – it’s better to find out along the way what may not be working so you can address and fix it, vs. not finding out and having the client come back a month or two down the road to say “this isn’t working, we are done”. <– Ouch!

What are your top tips for the first 90 days with a new client?


Biggest mistake I made leading my first retreat…

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I remember when I did my first small retreat back in 2013 – I made a mistake that is all too common for retreat leaders. Perhaps you can relate?

My friend Darla LeDoux is doing her ‘Pitch Me Your Retreat’ laser-coaching calls this week. If you have a retreat idea you are considering – or already have a retreat you are offering that isn’t working – be sure to hop on one of these sessions and get Darla’s direct feedback and advice. >> Click here to grab your spot

In the spirit of full disclosure this email includes affiliate links, so if you sign up for anything that Darla offers I may get an affiliate commission. Which would be awesome cause I know you would be in good hands – I only share stuff from folks I know and like, regardless of the affiliate commission. Enjoy!

Getting referrals

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Is it possible to build a business off of just referrals?

Yes, depending on your business model…

My New Puppy

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This is our Rosie – she’s a 12 week old Bernese Mountain Dog puppy.

We’ve had her now for just over 4 weeks and I’ve been learning some lessons that I’ve found useful in other areas of life as well.

Lesson #1 – Commitment to something outside of ourselves

This energetic little lady needs at least two walks a day – a tired puppy is a happy puppy right?

Well guess what, those twice daily walks have been just as good for me and my girls as they have for the pup. Not only are we getting more exercise… we are spending some quality time together as a family during our walks (where my 10 & 12 years old girls actually have to talk to me… gasp! 😉

And I’m also meeting people who have been my neighbors for over 10 years now who I’ve never met before… because I work from home and as a default I rarely leave my house.

Getting a dog has forced me to ‘get out’ more, which has led to many good things.

Food for thought: What commitment could you make to force yourself to ‘get out’ more in your business? 

Lesson #2 – We ALWAYS have a choice in how we respond

As cute as they are, puppies are annoying.

They pee on your carpet. They wake you up in the middle of the night whining. They have sharp little puppy teeth that like to chew on your hands and nip at your heels (ouch!)

And let me tell you – I’ve had (more) than a few moments of frustration. And yes, I’ve found myself yelling a couple of times BUT of course that doesn’t help anything.

Puppy training has been an exercise in patience. In deciding WHO I want to be in those moments of frustration.

Do I want to be a grump or do I want to take a deep breath and say ‘it’s OK and let’s work on it together’.

Food for thought: WHO are you showing up as in the moments when your business is annoying you?

Lesson #3 – Playing the long game

There is a window of time between 8 to 16 weeks where puppies learn A LOT. This is a foundational time for socialization, house training, crate training & various other aspects of good puppy habits.

The things we do during this 8 week period are going to mean MORE or LESS work down the road. The things we don’t do could lead to some big problems (for example, a dog who is afraid of people because they never met new people during this time.)

It’s a lot of work. A lot of time and energy during those 8 weeks.

Put that on top of an already busy life it is very tempting to say ‘forget it’ and not bother.

But I’m keeping the long game in mind. Knowing that what I do today will make a difference in the future (even when I don’t want to do it!)

And also reminding myself that this too shall pass. 😉

Food for thought: What are you putting off today that could pay dividends in the future?

For my fellow dog owners – what have you learned from your pups?

Send me a message and let me know. 🙂


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If a client doesn’t have ‘urgency’ in their business – I won’t work with them.

Here’s why.