What were you doing 10 years ago? (my story)

Jun 30, 2023

During my morning scroll of Facebook the other day I came across a post that asked this question:

“What were you doing 10 years ago?”

I paused for a moment and realized – it was 10 years ago that I decided to divorce my husband, and we officially separated in June of 2013.

10 years ago… woah! In some ways it feels like a lifetime ago and in other ways it feels like just yesterday.

One thing I remember so vividly about that time is wondering (and worrying) if I would be able to support myself and my girls fully through my business.

I started my business back in 1999 and up until the time of my separation it had always been both me and my husband contributing to the household expenses.

During my marriage I had the luxury – and safety net – of a spouse with whom I shared the cost of living. We both brought in about the same amount of money and when we separated it was certainly a big EEK to realize…

“Yipes – it’s now totally up to me. Can I do this? Can my business make enough money to support us?”

Spoiler alert – it did and has since then. 🙂

It really hit me when I saw that post the other day – my business has been the sole provider for me and my girls for 10 years now.

This is something to be proud of. To celebrate. In the hustle and bustle of daily life – and the ups and downs of business – it can be easy to forget and really own that I did that. Yahoo me! (pats self on back)

Is there any big secret or words of wisdom to impart here re: what it takes to survive and (mostly) thrive for 10 years in business?

No secret by any means. And any words of wisdom would be things I’m sure you’ve heard many times before. (Although I know we all need reminders of these things from time to time.)

Be committed to making it work. Getting a job was never an option in my mind so it wasn’t even something on my radar in those low “eek” moments (which we all face from time to time.) So my only option was to make my business work.

That being said – I also want to acknowledge that my business was already established at the time of my divorce. My journey was more about how to expand on the foundation I’d already built in my business vs. starting a new business. The latter is a more challenging time in many ways, and it might make sense to have a job or a ‘side gig’ in those early days.

Don’t be afraid of hard work. There are times when it won’t be easy. When you will have to do stuff that you’d rather not be doing. Even as you reach certain milestones in your success journey there will be new and different ‘hard’ things to deal with. It’s not uncommon to see folks get stalled/stuck when they are expecting things to be easier (and resisting the work that needs to be done.)

Become great at asking for help. There is NO way I could have accomplished this on my own. I’ve had the support of my team, my licensed trainings partners and various coaches and experts along the way. As a ‘recovering control freak’ asking for help does not come naturally for me – it was a skill I had to learn.

Have faith. When I think back on the low moments of the past 10 years (and yes, there have been plenty of those… it’s not all sunshine and roses) I had faith in a couple of things. I have faith in myself – knowing that I am a smart, tenacious and capable woman who is good at figuring things out. I also have faith in a higher power to guide the way and to know that we will always be taken care of. I’m not religious but I am spiritual and have definitely leaned into knowing and trusting that the universe/God has my back (when I am willing to do my part.)

I’m curious – what were you doing 10 years ago?


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