It’s been almost 4 years since I got divorced, and although that time was challenging on many levels there was one thing that (secretly) hurt me the most.
It was when people would say “Tina, I’m so sorry! How are the girls? You are so strong, I know you’ll be fine…”
It was said with love and the best of intention – I get that. But every time someone said it I would think:
“What about me? Why don’t they ask how I’m doing?”
The truth is that I am strong. I could take care of everything during this challenging time. My girls and I would be fine – I knew that.
BUT I secretly craved support. I wanted nothing more than to have someone say “Tina, let me help you here. Let me take this off your shoulders.”
I didn’t know how to ask for that support – so it didn’t happen.
Truth be told I’m sure it was offered at times but my own beliefs that “I have to take care of everyone, and I have to take care of things on my own” would have blinded me to it.
As time went on it became obvious that I could NOT keep doing it all alone. In order to keep running my business as a single mama I had to learn how to ask for – and RECEIVE – support.
I had to learn how to stop feeling GUILTY about asking for help and instead embrace it as a gift from one human to another.
It was one of the greatest lessons in my divorce – and one that I have learned to transfer to my business.
It is something I also see many other women struggling with too.
I am blessed to know some amazingly powerful, brilliant and gifted women who have created successful businesses and lives. They have hustled. They have done great work. They are proud of what they created – and they are TIRED.
Tired of carrying the weight of their success on their shoulders. Tired of feeling like they have to do it all alone (because that’s the way it’s always been done, right?) Tired to the point where they are questioning if they even want to continue (and secretly browsing the want ads for a job.)
The truth is this:
You, my friend, are here to do great work – and if you are being called to step into your next level of growth, you can’t do it alone.
The challenge is to invite support in. To seek it. To ask for it. And to receive the support that shows up.
Many successful women are subconsciously blocking their calling by keeping themselves in a space of ‘I’ve got this – let me figure it out on my own’.
Believe me, I know. I spent YEARS feeling like I had to figure it all out alone and carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.
Could you continue doing what you’ve always done and still be successful? Perhaps, but I suspect if you’ve read this far you are CRAVING support. You are craving connection.
Craving someone to give you the level of support that you so often give to others.
I’m not just talking about team support – although that certainly may come into play.
I’m talking about support for YOU as a leader. As an agent of change.
You need people around you who see your truth and honor it – without judgement or expectation.
People who celebrate the mess, and are there to walk with you through it (instead of expecting you to fix it alone.)
People who applaud your desire for more, instead of getting caught up in what your desire to change means for them.
If you crave support on this journey it would be my honor to offer it to you. I’m clear that I was called to go through my dark night of the business soul so that I could help you through yours.
I am putting together a small group of women who are going through this to help them birth what is next. If this speaks to you and you are ready to get support with a group of like-minded women then let’s talk.
Simply click here to share a little bit about yourself and we’ll be in touch to set up a 1:1 private conversation.